Culture Shock

At my very first API meeting, I got a handout of a crappy hand drawn roller coaster meant to represent the ups and downs of studying abroad. First you get there and you are happy and excited, then you plummet, then you're happy again, then you hate everyone, then you go home. I thought it was complete bullshit, especially because I'm only here for a month. I'm pretty sure I threw it away.

So wrong. I have had so many ups and downs since I've been here. I was super excited for the first few days, and then at some point I just plummeted and got so frustrated with not being able to speak the language and understand my classmates and my professor and just being away from home, and it was so hard for a few days. It was on its way back up until around today I guess, which was definitely one of my lowest points on the roller coaster. I woke up in such pain this morning I didn't want to get out of bed, but I have my final tomorrow so I had to go to class. My head was throbbing the entire way there. I was so sick and irritable in my morning class. Every little thing really got to me, and I was getting so frustrated with not being able to understand the activities that we were doing, which just made it harder for me to figure out what was going on. My professor asked me a question that I didn't know the answer to and she just kept pushing me and pushing me to give her the right answer, but I had no idea and I just wanted to start crying. It was so frustrating to me for some reason and I kept trying to tell myself that I'm in college and not know the answer shouldn't frustrate me so much but I just couldn't help it.

Then in my afternoon class my sickness really really got to me. The room was so hot that it was making me even sicker, and I had to leave a couple of times because I thought I was going to throw up. I just couldn't focus and I couldn't understand anything that anyone was saying to me and I could barely participate in the activity we were doing. My head was still throbbing and at one point my vision was going blurry and I felt like I was outside of my body. I was in so much pain I started crying, even though I was trying so hard not to, which just made it worse. My professor was really concerned about me, he kept asking me if I needed to leave and he gave me his phone number in case I couldn't make it home ok.

After class I heard that another girl from my school had gone home after throwing up during class, and another girl told me that she had felt the exact same way yesterday, which leads me to believe that we are all at the same stage on the roller coaster of culture shock. It's just one of the worst feelings in the world feeling this bad mentally and physically and being so far away from home and anyone who can do anything about it, which makes the feeling even worse.

My mom is coming on Thursday though and I don't want her to know that I'm having such a hard time as of recently and ruin her vacation. I'd also like to say right now that she wants to go to Versailles, which is probably one of the most overrated sites in France (worse than the Mona Lisa), and I will not be returning. Once is enough.

In a week and two days I'll be on a flight back to Boston and I'll regret wasting any of my time here on being homesick or actually sick or frustrated and stressed out in class, but for now I just kind of wish I was in my own bead.

Weekend Excursion

Today we had an excursion to Barbizon and Vaux le Vicomte, where we had way too much time at Vaux le Vicomte and way too little time at Barbizon.

Barbizon was this adorable little village that I am totally going to retire at. There were quite a few art galleries and museums that we didn't have enough time to go into.

Vaux le Vicomte is the chateau that Versailles was modeled after, and Nicolas Fouquet, its builder, was imprisoned for his entire life because Louis XIV was so jealous of his palace. It was nice, but we got there at like 5:30 and couldn't go into the chateau until 8 (awesome planning!) so we kind of mulled around the garden for several hours. When we finally did get into the chateau, we had to pretty much sprint through it in order to be back on the bus by 9. But it was still beautiful, and it was nice to spend time in the garden even if it was kind of excessive. The chateau was supposed to be fully candle-lit but we didn't get to fully experience it because it wasn't very dark when we left.

Then we proceeded to be American tourists and stop our bus at a McDonald's and rush in as one huge group. A lot of people in the group were kind of offended that we are in Paris and were wasting a meal at McDonald's but like...who can be mad at McDonald's? Plus I was hungry so shut up.

In other news, my "I Have 25 Euros in my Wallet etc." game went pretty well even though I had to hit the ATM for more money yesterday. But the game commences again on Monday, so be there.

I am the Thinker

Right after school, we booked it to meet up with our group at the Musee Rodin, the former home of the sculptor who created the Gates of Hell and the Thinker. Many of the pieces, particularly the ones displayed in the garden, were reproductions, but were made from the original mold (which makes them somewhat original?). The way it was explained to me, a sculpture is made with the intent of a mold being made and several copies of it being produced, all of which are considered "originals" but only one of which was actually the handcrafted sculpture.

Regardless, it was cool. I got more excited about some of the pieces at this museum that I had never heard of than I did about some of the well-known art at the Louvre and d'Orsay.

As I had predicted on the metro on the way there, the Thinker was crowded by (American) tourists next to the statue reproducing the position and taking pictures and thinking they were really clever. Original.

Pique Nique!

Okay I know I've been terrible about updating but I have a bunch of entries from the last few days saved on my computer that I will try to upload and date accordingly. I'm going to add pictures too since I have taken A TON.

I've decided to try playing this game, which came about because I spent about 80 euro in one day on Saturday. It is called "I Have 25 Euro in my Wallet and I'm Not Taking Money Out of the ATM until Friday". I like to think it's pretty self-explanatory but we'll see how it goes. I think I've spent about 7 euro in the last two days so pas mal.

I had a picnic with a bunch of my friends today at the garden behind (in front of?) the Louvre. It was beautiful (except for an unpleasant visit from a creepy man who exposed himself. Fun.) and it was so gorgeous out. There was also a carnival that we checked out but I refrained from playing any games to win crappy stuffed animals and buy overpriced Italian ice and churros for 3 euro (yes, carnivals are much the same in Paris as they are in America).

I wanted to go to Ireland for a weekend to visit a friend who is studying there, but we don't have any free weekends and it's all going by so fast that I don't think I'll be able to. I've said this so many times, but time really really flies in Paris. It's already week 3, and the days go by so fast. Even 3 hours of class breezes by. I feel like everyday I look at my watch and say "When did it get to be 10:30?!" ...though it doesn't help that it's usually still bright outside.

La Fete Nationale!

Aujourd'hui, c'est la fete nationale! La quatorze juillet! BASTILLE DAY! An important day for the French, mostly because...I don't have class today!

Even without class, I didn't get to sleep in, since we decided to leave at 7 am to get good spots at the parade...and we still didn't. We made it past the first barricade but we were in the dead last row. It was still a great experience though. We saw all the French military and tanks, and President Sarcozy was driven by as well. Though one of the things I saw the most of we very strange cardboard periscope things with mirrors on them that allowed people to see over the crowd. Fortunately the woman directly in front of me had a bright orange one that is in every single on of my pictures.
After the parade we went back to the dorm, packed a lunch, and headed out to find a spot to watch the fireworks. We ended up at the Place de la Concorde, near the Louvre, and we had an okay view of the Eiffel Tower but the fireworks were somewhat hidden by trees though. Both the parade and the fireworks were pretty cool even though we couldn't really see either of them... you really can't get mad when you're in Paris for Bastille Day.

"Do you want to go the the cemetery?! YEAH!"

This entire trip I have completely sympathized with Adrianne Curry from the first season of America's Next Top Model. She ends up in Paris with a bunch of chicks who want to shop at overpriced boutiques and buy shoes and purses and be boring and spend a lot of money. But all the poor girl wants to do is see Jim Morrison's grave.

Well today, ladies and gentlemen, after several weeks of lame shopping trips (among other things, but still), my friend (the Elise to my Adrianne) and I finally made it to la Cimitiere Pere Lachaise, home of the tomb of Jim Morrison. We also saw Oscar Wilde, Chopin, and Marcel Proust. The cemetery was huge and we actually spent 3 hours just walking around.

We were also too cheap to spend 2 euro on a map so I took a picture of the big one at the entrance and we consulted that throughout our visit.

Also, tonight was supposed to be a really exciting night in Paris, as there are a ton of Bals de Pompiers (Fireman's Balls) at all of the fire stations (pretty much big parties). Unfortunately we waited in line for about two hours talking to a creepy French man who kept making fun of Americans and pissing off our Phillipino friend, and then had to leave anyway because we needed to take the metro home before it closed. It was cool though, we came back to the dorm and made pasta. Equally as exciting.

Allez France!

Today, completely by accident, I ended up at a historic exhibition game of the French football team. Someone suggested we go to a football game, and not questioning it at all (despite the fact that it is in fact not football season), we went.

In 1998, the French national football team won the World Cup for the first time in their history, over almost 7 decades. Today was the 10 year anniversary of the victory, so they had a rematch exhibition game, and afterwards had one of the sickest fireworks shows I've ever seen.

Read more about the match here!

La Tour Eiffel

After over a week of being in Paris, I FINALLY saw the Eiffel Tower. We climbed to the top and it was windy, rainy, and scary, but SO COOL. I thought I was going to die on multiple occasions but still IT WAS SO COOL. You could see every part of Paris from the top.

Fun fact that I didn't know until too late: You can actually send postcards and letters from a post office at the top of the Eiffel Tower, and they have a special postmark that they put on it specifically saying that you sent it from the top of the Eiffel Tower. Had I known this I would have brought all of my postcards (thanks API for keeping me on top of stuff as usual). I might try to go back up and bring my postcards with me... Any excuse to go again I guess.

Parlez-vous francais?

I haven't had much time to update, between getting ready for my trip and working, and then actually getting here and getting settled, but I did make it to Paris!

My flight was something like 4 or 5 days ago (the time change really messed me up!) and it went pretty smoothly. Actually "smoothly" wouldn't be a great word to use since it was pretty turbulent which prevented me from sleeping and also made me pretty nauseous, but the lines at the airport were surprisingly short, I amused myself in the terminal by myself for about an hour, and I wasn't sitting next to anyone obnoxious. When I got to Charles de Gaulle airport, I got through customs fine (even though they didn't stamp my passport which made me angry...I want proof!), got my bag, and found the woman from API who was waiting for me and another girl on the same flight. Then we made our way to the Hotel Citadine, where everyone from our program would be staying during our orientation. They stuck 5 of us in each room, but everyone was very nice and easy to get along with so it was kind of fun, though if it had been for more than 3 days I can see it getting old.

After we checked into the Hotel, we explored the area a little bit, got sandwiches (I got a croque monsieur, which is a grilled cheese with ham, even though I don't like ham just because I loved the name) and waited around for the rest of the people from our program to make their way in. There were a lot of delayed flights (some up to 3 hours), which made my half hour delay seem like a joke. We had dinner at a cafe, and there was some kind of gay pride event going on all night that we explored, but we went to bed pretty early since most of us had missed out on sleeping through the night because of our flights.

The next day we had more orientation meetings, got European cell phones, and visited Versailles, which was hot, crowded, and way longer than it needed to be, but impressive nonetheless. The gardens in particular were spectacular, but I might just think that because it was a lot less crowded and hot outside. A group of us went to a pub that night and watched the Eurocup finals (Spain vs. Germany, spoiler alert: Spain won) and afterwards watched people go nuts in the streets.

Yesterday we visited Notre Dame cathedral after finishing up our orientation, then took a tour en Bateau Mouche on the Seine, where we saw le Musée d'Orsay, le Louvre, a bunch of fancy bridges, and the Eiffel tower from the boat. We went to another cafe for dinner, then my roommate's aunt took us on a little driving tour through Paris, and we caught a glimpse of the Eiffel tower lit up at night.

Today we had to get up early for our placement exams, so we saw our school (l'Institut Catholique de Paris, or le Catho) for the first time and it is really pretty. When we got back to our hotel we checked out and brought all of our bags to the dorm, and now we're all getting settled (slash checking Facebook since we all have wireless in our rooms now). The dorms are so nice, everyone has a great view and the rooms are enormous! They're all singles, but I had a single at school in America and my room here is easily twice the size of it. There's a sink and a huge closet and a desk...it's so nice. The only thing is, it's not that close to where the school is so we're going to have to take the metro/RER and switch lines at least once, but I guess we'll figure it out.

Tomorrow is our first day of classes, and we'll be visiting le Musée d'Orsay.

I'm realizing how truly terrible I am at French. I think I can write it fine, but I have a difficult time understanding people when they are speaking it, and coming up with things to say on my own, but hopefully it will improve in my time here (really, it can't get worse).

Home Away from Home?

So I got my housing assignment today... and I got assigned to a dorm! I guess bitching and moaning until you get what you want really works, since not only did I e-mail and call API, but I had my dad e-mail and call them, and I filled out the housing request form pretty much demanding a dorm room and saying that I am allergic to everything and would cry myself to sleep every night if I had to live with a family. It's called persistence.

In other news, I took a diagnostic test today and got a 52%. Yeah that's an F. I guess I need to brush up on my French a little bit... Luckily it doesn't count for placement, but I really have to get back into the swing of French if I want to place in an appropriate level class! Unfortunately I didn't plan very well and I didn't take any French classes last semester so I'm a little rusty.

It occurred to me today when I got my housing assignment that this is really happening...and soon! I'm definitely starting to get nervous.

The countdown begins!

After a couple of last minute requests from API for documents, I e-mailed them asking if there was anything else that I needed to submit. And they returned my e-mail saying that I was all set. All set. Like I have everything submitted to them. Like I don't need to make random trips to get things copied or signed or notarized and send them next day to API because I didn't know that I needed them. Like they have everything they need from me. As long as all set means the same thing to API as it does to me, I am completely logistically ready to go to France. (Note that I said logistically. Mentally and physically I still have a ways to go.)

So in 24 days I will be on a flight to France. Holy merde.

Light Reading

I got another ultimatum e-mail from API today, saying that they need my passport picture NOW or they won't be my bff anymore or something. But I won't go into that because I don't want to make this into an API hate blog (even though it's a little late for that). Let's just say that if I make it through this, I'm starting an API Survivors Anonymous support group ("the other AA").

I decided that since I'm going to a foreign country in, oh, a month, I should probably read up a little bit on my destination. So I went to Border's today and bought two Frommer's books, Paris Day by Day and Portable Paris 2008. I also bought Savoir Flair by Polly Platt, which looks like it will be really helpful with fitting in culturally. I was looking for some student-centered guides but couldn't find any, so if there are any recommendations, throw them at me.

One Missed Call

I hate to make this a blog about how much I hate API and the study abroad program at my school, but so far frustration has been a big part of my study abroad experience. And frankly if you're going to share this experience with me, you need to share in my frustrations. You are living vicariously through me. So let's journey together.

Today I check my voicemail, and I have a call from API. The message is that they have not yet received my paperwork, and were wondering if I was still planning on going on the trip. Then the woman goes on to say that they need the paperwork...today.

This is not the first time that they have given me a ridiculous deadline. I received a letter in the mail stating that I owe them several thousands of dollars by ...two days prior to receiving the letter.

I'm not totally sure where it's okay for a company to not mention any deadlines until the day of. Luckily I sent out my paperwork a few days ago, but what if I hadn't. The call was at 3:18 pm. How would I get that paperwork to them today? Short of driving to Texas, I'm not sure it's possible. I will truly be thankful if I get to Paris and have somewhere to live and have successfully registered in some (ANY) classes.

In other news, I got my visa today. Less than a week after my adventure to the French consulate. So everyone who told me it would take 90 days can suck it.

Adventures at the French Consulate

So this morning my lovely father woke me up bright and early so that we could venture in to Boston and apply for a student visa. This process has been kind of a daunting task, and everytime I mention the word visa at school, somebody gives me a big sob story about how it take 4 months or 90 days or 15 years and your first born to get a visa. Even the woman at CVS was warning me that I need to start applying for stuff now if I think I'm going to go to Paris in July. I was going to go get my visa once before, but I hadn't read the information very carefully and didn't have a lot of the documents I needed. The list of necessary documents found on the consulate website was almost as intimidating as the horror stories about processing time. But finally I got all of my belongings together and made the journey to Boston.

I would just like to say that everyone who offered me any advice about getting my visa prior to today is a liar. Getting my visa was probably one of the easiest parts of the preparation process. Having all of the necessary documents in order helped, but the wait wasn't long, it was a pretty organized process, and I'm going back on Tuesday to pick up my visa. Yes, this coming Tuesday. 4 days from now, not 90.

The visa process was a huge relief from the stress and disorganization of the process so far. I'm hoping this becomes a theme for the rest of my trip!

You're Welcome

I decided today that I was going to keep a blog about my study abroad experience. You lucky people.

I'm leaving for Paris in a little over a month, but I would say my study abroad "experience" started about March when I decided that I wanted to participate in the program. I've been hesitant to say the least, and I only recently decided for sure that I would be going for the summer. So recently in fact that I received an ultimatum e-mail from API, the program that I will be studying through, a few days ago stating that I need to pay them or they were going to take me out of the program, and in fact, I still need to send out my paperwork.

I think that most people would think that I am crazy for not jumping at the opportunity to go to Paris, since my schedule and finances allow for it. But the experience has not been an easy one so far. The program has been disorganized so far, and I'm still not totally sure what's going on. Every time I try to get information from the study abroad office, they give me information about the culture. I'm not worried about the culture. I'm worried about getting there at all with the mountains of paperwork. My parents have been less than helpful throughout this experience as well. My dad mostly just asks a lot of questions that I have already answered, and my mom's contribution is that she is trying to find a reasonably priced round trip plane ticket to France so that she can come visit me.

Basically, I came into this experience with no passport, no clue, and no guidance, and now, I have a passport.

One of the more recent twists that I found out from the ever-reliable API is that even though I am requesting a dorm room, I probably will not get one. This is because they have reserved 10 dorm rooms for 50+ applicants. The rest (me included, because as I said I have not handed in my paperwork and I just paid them yesterday) will be staying with host families throughout Paris. Luckily the program manager casually mentioned this to my father during one conversation that I'm sure involved a lot of questions from him, otherwise I would be very surprised and annoyed when my housing placement was not in a dorm as I expected. Unfortunately for API, they still have 39 other people who are about to be very irritated.

Needless to say, my study abroad experience has not been a positive one so far. People keep saying that study abroad is an experience I will never forget. That I will be forever grateful that I took the opportunity to go to Paris while I was in college. That I will have the time of my life and it will change me as a person. But so far I feel like I'm being dumped in a foreign country where I barely speak the language despite a long and painful career in French classes, and at this point I don't care if it's life-changing, I just want to make it home alive.